I have a sympathy for old whiskered Europeans with horns. Enjoy.

• Brotzman:
• Parker:
• And more Brotzman with his Like a Dog Quartet:

I am a fan of a small margin at the margins of the already marginal avant-garde jazz called “European Free Improvisation.”  It just occurred to me to search youtube for documentation of performances by free improv artists.  I was thinking that it might be easier to offer a taste this way than by recommending obscure recordings.  I’ve been away from following this kind of work for a while, but the ongoing Lichtenbergian question “Is it Art?” got me to return to my enthusiasm for this kind of sound making.  John Corbett’s book Extended Play:  Sounding Off from John Cage to Dr. Funkenstein was a great intro I stumbled over a number of years ago.  In finding link info for that book I found that there’s is a new book about the late guitarist and writer Derek Bailey (Derek Bailey and the History of Free Improvisation) who is to students of Improvisation what Bronowsky was to young students finding new enthusiasms for the history of Western intellectual development.  Even had, like “Dr. Bloody Bronowsky,” a BBC series turned into a book.  I’ll be searching for some youtubes of Bailey, and of others, for future posts.  No, I won’t ignore the Americans.  Give me time.

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I’m planning this year’s Appalachian Trail sojourn. Anyone who wants to come along should leave me a comment below so I can arrange a date that’s amenable to all. I’ll probably take two separate trips — one in late spring (May?) and another about mid-summer (July?). Each trip will probably be about a week long.

Just let me know. If you plan on going, I would suggest you start conditioning yourself NOW.

Jeff

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What must they really think of us?

The deviled eggs, someone said. She can never pass up deviled eggs.

At 1 a.m. I was still stuffing dollar bills into eggs. Candy used to be good enough.

Folding chairs in the church. Cars stretched in a line like ants down that little country road.

I couldn”t find my dress shoes this morning. I said the Nicene Creed in my hiking boots.

Who first came up with the idea of plastic Easter grass?

I know I will have to deconstruct the vacuum next week and pull something out.

I didn”t wear a tie. My neck is much too plump. I cannot button the top button without turning mobile casino blood red.

Lent is over. Jesus is risen. Alleluia, alleluia.

What becomes of all those empty plastic eggs that litter the ground afterward?

We forgot to feed the rabbit today.  He is thirsty as I type this.

I took pictures. We all look happy and well-groomed. Bickering not included as part of the historical record.

We ate, but brought nothing. Typical.

Easter, post-coitus. I lie naked in my bed.

Jesus is risen, but I am going to sleep.

Alleluia, alleluia. All the eggs have been accounted for.

I did not have my Cadbury egg this year.

Someone is singing downstairs.

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Keys. Keys to what?

Hover over them. Wait. Not yet. Not yet.

Plugged in. Filter out. Metafilter. Meta-metafilter.

We sit. We sit. We sit.

Hover and tap. Churn. Hover, tap tap.

The room is dark and cold. I cough and the room echoes.

Somewhere else, far away, I dance casino online in the Sun.

Sometimes I can almost remember.

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The radio station that I listen to on my way into work is running a contest right now that is very Lichtenbergian. In honor of people who put off their taxes to the last minute, they are asking that people send in stories of procrastination. This can be a story where the procrastination resulted in either amazing victory or humiliating defeat. The winner will get to have their taxes done for free.

My taxes are already done, so I’m out of the contest. It did make me curious, though. I would love to hear the Lichtenbegians’ best procrastination stories.

Mike

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Do we Lichtenbergians wish to help with this? No pressure — just asking. If we decide to do it, we should prepare special Lichtenbergian Society baskets. Whatever that means. Eggs with aphorisms? What would be appropriate? Whatever we do, if we do anything, let’s make sure people know who it’s from. Because that’s how we roll.

ACE needs 88 Easter dinners for local terminally ill children

Published 3/15/08 in The Times-Herald

By CAITLYN VAN ORDEN
caitlyn@newnan.com
It doesn’t look like the Easter Bunny will be coming to some homes in Coweta this year.

The Newnan-based Alliance for Children’s Enrichment needs 200 Easter baskets and 88 Easter dinners by Tuesday. But, as of Thursday, ACE had only 16 baskets and no dinners whatsoever. The baskets will be given to children ages 2 to 10 who are terminally ill, and the dinners will be given to low-income families, especially those with members facing the end of life.

Easter baskets can be store-bought or handmade. Suggested items for baskets include: individually wrapped candy, gum, fruit and nuts; small toys such as jacks, pickup sticks, small stuffed animals, small metal cars, marbles and bubbles; toothbrushes and toothpaste; hair bands or barrettes; small bottles of shampoo; conditioner; lotion; and packs of underwear or socks. ACE recommends smaller amounts of candy than are usually found in Easter baskets.

Easter dinners may be uncooked or precooked. Gift cards ranging from $25 to $50 are also acceptable.

If purchasing food, ACE recommends the following grocery list: ham, chicken or turkey; a 10-pound bag of potatoes; four cans of green beans, peas or other vegetables; 5-pound bag of self-rising flour; 5-pound bag of sugar; box of tea bags; roll of aluminum foil; one gallon of regular milk; one quart of buttermilk; one container of solid vegetable shortening; 1-pound butter; one container of whipped cream; one or two bags of frozen strawberries; one box of angel food cake mix; two dozen eggs; one container of mayonnaise; one container of mustard; bag of onions or bunch of green onions; one jar of sweet pickles chips; a head of lettuce; and a loaf of sandwich bread. This will provide the family with Easter dinner, ingredients for other meals, and ingredients for sandwiches from any leftovers.

Baskets can be dropped off at the ACE office, 8 Carmichael St., Newnan. Those wishing to sponsor a family may call the ACE office at 770-254-3339. ACE will be closed for Good Friday on March 21 and would like to have all donations in by March 18.

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March 11, 2008

New York Times

North Hollywood, California. Camera bulbs flashed aplenty yesterday evening outside of the Hollywood Tower Hotel, but this was no star-studded gala or blockbuster movie premiere. No, the press turned out in droves to see a press conference held by an unknown comedian and comedy writer–at least someone claiming to be such. The reason this PC attracted so much attention is that the person who has lived for 26 years as Mike Funt admitted, at last, to being in actuality Amelia Earhart.

Earhart went missing and was presumed dead since January 1939, during her attempt to be the first pilot to circumnavigate the globe. What actually happened, she explained during the press conference yesterday, is that she had grown weary of aviation and wanted to enter show business. “Comedy is a tough business for a woman,” said Earhart. “I knew I would never pull it off as a woman. So I landed my plane in Japan, purchased a new wardrobe, and flew back to the states.”

Earhart went on to explain that in her new identity as a man, she had no life experience from which to draw comedy. She decided to lay low for a while and find a family in which she could grow up as a male. Finally, in 1982 she discovered the Funt family in Tampa, Florida. They seemed dysfunctional enough to provide the appropriate mentality for a comedian. She approached the Funts with her plan, and after a $100,000 enticement, they agreed to raise her as their son.

Afraid that friends and neighbors in Tampa would become leery of a new baby when Mrs. Funt hadn’t even been pregnant, the Funts and their phony child moved to the small town of Newnan, just south of Atlanta in Georgia. Earhart did everything she could to make the experience as horrible as possible. She deliberately made herself a nerdy bookworm of a young boy, a dorky and socially awkward teenager, and saw to it that the Funts were divorced. She went out of her way to make her childhood and teen years as hellish as possible to provided the painful background and thirst for attention that all comedians need.

After achieving mild levels of success in various cities around the country, Earhart returned to her actual hometown of North Hollywood, where as Mike Funt, she finally met her goals of performing and writing comedy in Hollywood. However, being 111 years old and being so close to her original life finally put enough pressure on her to come clean. Earhart refused to comment on whether she would continue to write and perform as Funt.