An opportunity, if not an assignment

Garrison Keillor is having a contest over at his website: write a 70-541-VB sonnet.  You can read about that here.

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  • I like sonnets.  I may give this one a whirl.  It may be about bare-chested men drinking around a 98-362 fire.

    Distractor Post

    Please DO NOT LOOK AT the post immediately under this one!
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    Signed,

    Grover, the furry blue monster

    http://events.o2i-ingenierie.fr/new-balance-pas-cher/

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    Licky Witherspoon a fraud?

    By Beth Norton

    bnorton@nytimes.com

    “Enthralled” is a word perhaps too often associated with what has become the Lickey Witherspoon phenomenon — a simple Google search comes up with 3,436,905 pairings of the terms “Lickey” and “enthralled” in critical reviews — but no other word comes close to capturing the reaction of millions of viewers when Oprah Winfrey pulled the rug out from Witherspoon live on national television last week.

    Witherspoon at first tried to shrug off Winfrey’s increasingly combative series of accusations. He laughed — albeit a bit nervously — when she turned to page 346 of his latest allegedly “autobiographical” tome and then quoted a nearly verbatim passage from a little-known memoir of an obscure Indonesian fisherman. But all laughter ceased when Winfrey asked Witherspoon point blank why he had lied to her last spring about his supposed upbringing in a Texas whorehouse.

    “I didn’t lie,” Witherspoon insisted. “To me, it was a whorehouse. Maybe to others it wasn’t. But to me, 1980s suburbia was the worst kind of brothel.”

    The revelations didn’t stop there. The New York Times has since learned that Witherspoon, contrary to the picture laid out so colorfully in “Travels With the Garbageman,” never had sex with a baboon, did not miraculously recover from a rare case of bubonic plague, and never learned to speak Cantonese. In fact, Witherspoon isn’t even Witherspoon. His real name, as it turns out, is Jeff Bishop, who until eight months ago was an obscure small-town journalist living in the rural South.

    Of course, “Witherspoon” still vigorously denies this.  His publicist stopped returning calls as of Tuesday afternoon, but in his latest public statement on the matter, Witherspoon says he was “ambushed” by Oprah. “I was unprepared and, frankly, shocked by the whole episode,” Witherspoon said. “I never claimed to be anything more than an entertainer. I gave the world what it seemed that the people wanted. No — what they NEEDED. And I suppose, like my father always said, no good deed goes unpunished.”

    Rumors have surfaced of sightings of Lickey in Paris, but these are unconfirmed. His publisher says there is no recall planned of any of Witherspoon’s memoirs.

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    “We were as dismayed as anyone, when we heard the allegations,” said one rep from the company, who spoke on the condition of anonymity. “But we still don’t feel like we have all the facts. And the book is, frankly, selling more copies following the Oprah incident. Like Lickey says, we’re giving the people what they want.”

    Manhattan redeveloped

    Here’s an idea that I had that I will never play with, so feel free to take it. (Hence the newly renamed category Waste.)

    I was playing school one day and showing kids what Manhattan looked like so they could better describe Piet Mondrian’s Broadway Boogie-Woogie, and I fell to musing about the nature of the grid of avenues and streets.C4090-454

    Mostly I mused about how we never seem to have caught on to the idea in all the development going on around here.

    So, I mused, what would Manhattan look like if it had been developed by the developers of SummerGrove? I posited laying out a patchwork of dead-end streets overlayed on the grid, an exurban hell where now exists the world’s greatest city.

    I played with it for a few minutes, even developed the map at left in PhotoShop, but completing it was just not in my schedule.

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    I think it would be a great conceptual piece. Feel free to steal it.C4090-453